The Poor Man: Because You Are Idiots
The Poorman seemed to lose the muse for a while, and it looked like he was going to sign off his blog. But he is back, and the mighty scimitar of sarcasm has not lost a step. This piece, on the looming right-wing attack on the last bastion of leftiness, is a keeper.
This "problem" will be dealt with the way every other left-wing conspiracy has been dealt with. First, it will be whined about incessantly, and anyone who tells them to pipe down will be accused of hating America. This can be kept up indefinitely, because, if there is one thing conservatives are good at, it is whining about how oppressed they are by nebulous crypto-commie cabals. (The other thing they are good at is gloating about how they control everything. Both can be done at the same time without any discomfort.) Peter Beinart will assume that there's something to this, and write about how the Democrats need to abandon their unmanly intellectual elitism and embrace the proud Democratic tradition of Wavy Gravy. Gregg Easterbrook will mount his 600 cubic hectare gravity bong and write a column about how the theories of evolution and relativity are only theories, maaaan, and as such are no better than his theory that there is an infinitely wise and kind and just spirit controlling the universe who allows the creatures he loves unconditionally to suffer the many arbitrary cruelties of this world, such as Gregg Easterbrook columns. Principled liberals and moderates will roll over, and public universities will create Departments of Conservative Studies, where you can earn a Doctorate in Wingnuttery for your dissertation on how the Dixie Chicks made us lose Vietnam.
Blow, big man.
This "problem" will be dealt with the way every other left-wing conspiracy has been dealt with. First, it will be whined about incessantly, and anyone who tells them to pipe down will be accused of hating America. This can be kept up indefinitely, because, if there is one thing conservatives are good at, it is whining about how oppressed they are by nebulous crypto-commie cabals. (The other thing they are good at is gloating about how they control everything. Both can be done at the same time without any discomfort.) Peter Beinart will assume that there's something to this, and write about how the Democrats need to abandon their unmanly intellectual elitism and embrace the proud Democratic tradition of Wavy Gravy. Gregg Easterbrook will mount his 600 cubic hectare gravity bong and write a column about how the theories of evolution and relativity are only theories, maaaan, and as such are no better than his theory that there is an infinitely wise and kind and just spirit controlling the universe who allows the creatures he loves unconditionally to suffer the many arbitrary cruelties of this world, such as Gregg Easterbrook columns. Principled liberals and moderates will roll over, and public universities will create Departments of Conservative Studies, where you can earn a Doctorate in Wingnuttery for your dissertation on how the Dixie Chicks made us lose Vietnam.
Blow, big man.
posted by bluememe at 12/11/2004
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