Sure looks like progress to me

As IEDs in Iraq become more effective, a new arms race is taking place. The Pentagon is now starting to deploy the "Cougar" from a company called Force Protection, Inc. Take a gander:


That smart, post-modern look just says "progress and democracy," doesn't it? And check out these impressive specs:

Weight: 37,000 pounds
Horsepower: 330

Those numbers should allow it to do a scorching 0-60 of approximately "never." The Cougar is essentially a slow-moving bunker. The only thing a vehicle that heavy can do is resist being hit. It will likely be doing a lot of that, since it will be unable to drive its way out of very many problems. To give a sense of scale, here it is compared to the Hummer you may have seen clogging up the freeway at the hands of some manhood-challenged wanker:



The Hummer is a mere 7000 pounds in civilian guise, perhaps 11,000 in up-armored trim. This new rolling Green Zone may protect its payload against IEDs, but in an urban context I predict it will be worse than useless. They will end up trapped in narrow alleys, crippled with blown-out tires, waiting for rescue by what -- another Cougar?

We are responding to the asymmetry of urban guerilla warfare by becoming less mobile.

I guess we measure progress by the measures needed to allow our troops to survive. At this rate, Iraq will soon be as safe as the moon.

Oh, and the design isn't new -- South Africa used very similar trucks to enforce Apartheid way back when. Some of the engineers who designed them now work for Force Protection, Inc., the U.S. contractor building these. How Werner von Braun-ish.