Sunday, August 28, 2005

New Category: the Meta-LATEOTT

Bush Predicts Cooperation in Iraq
CRAWFORD, Texas - President Bush predicted Sunday that the Iraqi people will work together toward a new constitution, despite the failure to complete a draft that has the backing of all the country's ethnic and political groups.

"Of course there is disagreement," Bush told reporters. "We are watching a political process unfold."

"Some Sunnis have expressed reservations about various provisions in the constitution and that's their right as free individuals in a free society," the president said.

Despite the problems, Bush said the Iraqi people "have once again demonstrated to the world that they are up to the historic challenges before them.

He called the draft constitution "a document of which the Iraqis and the rest of the world can be proud."

Just as we talked of retiring George Bush from the LATEOTT competition to give others a fair shot at the title, ol' Dubya releases a statement so brazenly at odds with reality that he single-handledly creates a whole new category of self-delusion. We therefore create in Mr. Bush's honor a new award -- the Double Down Award, for statements that simultaneously acknowledge that the last 'light at the end of the tunnel' was a train and in the same breath express optimism that the next light will surely bring good news.

Congratulations, Sir. You have elevated self-delusion to a level unimaginable before you blessed us with your verbal derring-do.


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