Bible :: Beast's real mark devalued to '616'

Satanists, apocalypse watchers and heavy metal guitarists may have to adjust their demonic numerology after a recently deciphered ancient biblical text revealed that 666 is not the fabled Number of the Beast after all.

A fragment from the oldest surviving copy of the New Testament, dating to the Third century, gives the more mundane 616 as the mark of the Antichrist.

Ellen Aitken, a professor of early Christian history at McGill University, said the discovery appears to spell the end of 666 as the devil's prime number.

"This is a very nice piece to find," Dr. Aitken said. "Scholars have argued for a long time over this, and it now seems that 616 was the original number of the beast."

Like Bureau of Labor Statisitics output, it appears the Bible's numbers require revisions after initial publication. And the real world implications may be equally important. Think of all the tattoo artists working overtime trying to figure out how to change goth sixes into ones...

Oh, and can someone remind me which version of the Bible is the inerrant one?