Thursday, November 18, 2004

Take me now, Lord

That whirring noise you hear is the sound of every minimally-educated child developmental specialist on the planet rolling his or her eyes:

"HOUSTON (Reuters) - Camouflage was in and cross-dressing was out at a rural East Texas school district after a Christian legal group complained a long-standing school tradition of reversing social roles for a day would promote homosexuality.

Students in Spurger, Texas were encouraged by school officials to wear camouflage hunting gear to class on Wednesday after they called off their annual 'TWIRP Day' in which boys dressed as girls and vice versa.

The cross-dressing tradition began some years back as a kind of Sadie Hawkins Day where girls ask boys to go out on dates.

TWIRP stands for 'The Woman Is Requested To Pay.'

But Delana Davies, who has two children in the Spurger school, complained this year that the tradition could promote homosexuality and got the Liberty Legal Institute, a right-wing Christian legal group, to take up the cause.

'It might be fun today to dress up like a little girl -- kids think it's cute and things like that. And you start playing around with it and, like drugs, you do a little here and there (and) eventually it gets you,' Davies told reporters.

'It is outrageous that a school in a small town in east Texas would encourage their 4-year-olds to be cross-dressers,' institute litigation director Hiram Sasser said.

He sought and obtained permission from the district for the woman's children to stay out of school for the day.

School attorney Tanner Hunt told Reuters the Liberty group misrepresented TWIRP Day and made it sound sinister when it has always been innocent fun.

'I guarantee you nobody on the school board or in the administration ever had that cross their minds,' Hunt said of the 'cross-dressing' reference.

Sasser said it was not his intent to disparage the school.

'The district gets mad every time I say 'cross-dress,' but I don't know what other way to describe it,' he told Reuters.

Because of the controversy, school officials decided to change Wednesday from TWIRP Day to Camouflage Day, in what Hunt described as a reference to the clothing hunters wear during deer-hunting season, which is going on now and is enormously popular in rural Texas.

Despite the change from TWIRP Day, Hunt said some of the students stuck to the old tradition and wore clothes of the opposite sex.

'I understand from the superintendent that some of the boys dressed in pink shorts anyway,' he said."

One of my first and favorite stops in the blogosphere, General J.C. Christian's site, picked this up a few days ago, and I happened to run across the original wire service story looking for something else this evening. You should stop by and read his piece on it, as well as everything else he's written. Be sure to read the comments, too. He has collected what might be the most brilliantly demented crew of correspondents in cyberspace.

But anyways, this is a pretty new blog, and I had hoped to keep the level of discourse reasonably high. Now, it's true that Mr. Bluememe's near-psychotic obsession with dairy-based religious icons has already damaged any aspirations we may have had for street cred in the realm of sociopolitical analysis, but I had hoped to hold on to some shred of decorum and dignity. You know, thoughtful posts, clean language, all that.

But fuck. I mean, fuck. These people are all so fucking ignorant that it's impossible to pick the most fucking ignorant one out of the fucking crowd. Maybe I shouldn't be so judgmental with the complaining mom in the case. She's just expressing her authentic anxieties, however misguided they may be, although even casual contemplation of her fears suggests that if every little kid who dressed up like their opposite sexed parent flipped, we'd be a nation of time-warping Frank-n-Furters. And I am not in the least surprised that a right wing lawyer with a right wing agenda would characterize pretend play and dress-up as "cross-dressing" in order to stir the pot a bit (although it sounds like the pinhead might actually believe it).

The school officials, well, "galactically stupid" is the first phrase that pops to mind. If you're going to cave to the small-minded fears of the community, well, OK, go ahead, there's a lot of it going around these days, and you're only subject to everyday condemnation for that. But if you're going to pseudovalidate the fear that clothes make the man (or in this case, unmake him), why would you do anything but just cancel the event? Wouldn't putting the tots in camo theoretically prime them for another Columbine? It's not really going to turn any of them into homicidal maniacs or even good shots during hunting season, of course, but what the fuck was the rationale?

Jeebus. The term "fucktard" was born for situations like this.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Someone needs a nice grilled cheese sandwich.

9:06 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

grilled cheese?
how about an enema?

"galactically stupid- is a stupid first phrase

pseudovalidate- very pseudo intellectual phrase

The term "fucktard"-should suffer a still birth

Jeebus-a term in search of an abortion

6:35 PM  

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